I'm getting married.

[mikeofcontex]

She's sure purdy! I'm guessing that with your upbringing, it's not just skin deep.

[RonM]

Congrats, prayers for you and your intended.

I can't add much to what has already been said. Marriage is one of the most wonderfull, incredible things in life!!

Every time someones getting married, I have to tell my favorite marriage joke.

"Remember, a man is never complete until he is married..................and then he's finnished."

[JKDGabe]

Originally Posted by mikeofcontex

She's sure purdy! I'm guessing that with your upbringing, it's not just skin deep.

Where to start? She's a good cook, helps keep the house clean and takes care of her younger siblings, likes to garden and most importantly, loves the Lord! There is one thing that worries me, she must have poor eyesight because I can't figure out what she sees in me!

[mikeofcontex]

Originally Posted by JKDGabe

Where to start? She's a good cook, helps keep the house clean and takes care of her younger siblings, likes to garden and most importantly, loves the Lord! There is one thing that worries me, she must have poor eyesight because I can't figure out what she sees in me!

Myself and a very good friend frequently remind ourselves that we married up. I think it's grand that the grace of God is temporal as well as eternal. Just smile when you're asked why such a doll would fall for such a one as you. I do!

[SL350]

Congratulations Gabe! "To love another is to look into the face of God" - Les Miserables

[Tourmeister]

Originally Posted by JKDGabe

Where to start? She's a good cook, helps keep the house clean and takes care of her younger siblings, likes to garden and most importantly, loves the Lord! There is one thing that worries me, she must have poor eyesight because I can't figure out what she sees in me!

Women have a knack for seeing what you CAN be, and not fixating on what you are Wise is the woman that can express that vision without coming across like a nag. Wise also is the man that can accept that vision without feeling like he is being criticized.

[trl5791]

yeah ditto on the wedding is not the big part it is over in way less time than you can imagine.
best advice I can give is to do dave ramseys financial peace first ,it would shock you how many marriages fall into hard times over money, and then find a spirit filled church and get plugged in. dont let the little things grow into mountains, which will be easy at first but after seven or eight years you will need a riminder.
congrats on the covenant with your lovely bride.

[Loyd]

Originally Posted by Tourmeister

Women have a knack for seeing what you CAN be, and not fixating on what you are.

So you think women marry fixer-uppers eh?

[JKDGabe]

Originally Posted by Loyd

So you think women marry fixer-uppers eh?

The good ones do. Never thought of myself as a "fixer upper" before, although I am a "classic" in car years.

[Tourmeister]

Originally Posted by Loyd

So you think women marry fixer-uppers eh?

Well, many women work that way, but not the good ones. If a woman understands the power of genuine positive praise, she can have the man of her dreams. If she just nags, she will be sorely disappointed. Men are generally highly motivated when they know someone truly believes in them. However, if they believe someone does not believe in them, it can really demotivate them. So it is more about the woman helping the man to believe in himself and what is already there as opposed to "fixing" him, which implies he's broken or defective in some way. Few of us really see our own potential and live up to it. A good spouse lovingly and respectfully helps the other to see and realize that potential.

[JKDGabe]

Originally Posted by Tourmeister

Well, many women work that way, but not the good ones.

I say that I am a fixer upper in relation to what I think of her. Most good ones don't have to marry below themselves although I have seen a couple of them do it.

I'm leaving tomorrow to go up to TN. Will be away from my beloved farm for two weeks! I'm sure I'll enjoy it as long as it rains here while I'm gone. Please pray for safe travelling for a bunch of folks, not only did a surprising number of my friends here in TX say they're going, she has quite a bit of family in IL going down. So much for the small wedding we both wanted. Every cloud has a silver lining though... gifts.

[Red Brown]

Originally Posted by JKDGabe

I say that I am a fixer upper in relation to what I think of her.

Hopefully you have courted each other for an extended period of time and have remained chaste during that time or at least tried to your best ability. Perhaps partaking of pre-marriage counselling is a step in the right direction. The Catholic Church has an excellent program that is well regarded by different denominations. I can't quite remember the name. I have heard that about 20 or so percent of those that attend the four day workshop decided marriage is not for them, at least not with their "chosen" partner.

If you go to a counsellor when you have real issues, it it much harder to heal or to be reconciled. Anyway, with divorce at almost fifty percent, the big issue besides money matters, is the lack of a healthy conflict dispute mechanism. When you get really mad and have the unavoidable conflict, how do you resolve the differences?

With no easy answer, the right step is developing a deep sense of humility with each other ("The last shall be first"). So much so, you can express issues without fear of escalating the conflict into something bigger than it actually is.

Hopefully she is very accepting of the motorcycle lifestyle...

RB

[h2000fb]

Originally Posted by JKDGabe

Where to start? She's a good cook, helps keep the house clean and takes care of her younger siblings, likes to garden and most importantly, loves the Lord! There is one thing that worries me, she must have poor eyesight because I can't figure out what she sees in me!

Well, she's not marrying you for your hair! Thank God there are women that look past looks or neither of us would be married!

Congradulations! Your life will never be the same... in a good way!

Have a happy and blessed life!

[donroger1]

Prayers for safe travel Gabriel.

A lot of people here have mentioned unconditional love. I always thought that I was doing just that. Attended a conference by Gary Chapman that really opened my eyes.
His website is The Five Love Languages.
Just taking the 30 second assessment with your Wife to be could be enlightening.

The bottom line is that not all people express and feel love the same way.

Working on 25 years this time.