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[Ride Report] The Dee's Nut Incident 10/04/03

Tourmeister

Keeper of the Asylum
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Howdy,

:tab We had a blast. Several crazy stories to tell. Pics forthcoming ;-)

Adios,
 
Yeah... Tell us about the Dees Nuts incident... :eek:
 
First off, a big HOWDY and WELCOME to nooby Sara (without an h). You can ride b... huh...with me anytime. :)

Yeah, I can't wait to hear the stories too!!!
 
irondawg said:
Yeah, I can't wait to hear the stories too!!!

John, I think you WERE the story! :wink:

Great accomodations you found for us too, even though we all had to do a little dirt trackng to get to them...:eek: :mrgreen:
 
Okay...here's Dee's Nuts Incident

There we were, in the glorious hills having just completed 337 run to Camp Wood at the junction of 335 and hwy 55. Scott decides he wants to take 55 and I tell him that it's best to run it and turn around since there's not much after the fun part. At this point, I check fuel, little less than half tank so I should have plenty for the trip back to Leakey, about 70 some odd miles and the closest place to refuel. So off we go. If you've never been on this 12 mile stretch of 55, you're missing some of the finest that the hill country has to offer. A four lane highway of twisties that 'could' be run at triple digit speeds, if you were some sort of hooligan.

After a spirited ride down and back to 335 :wink: Scott waves me past and I take the lead. About half way up is a road I've wanted to take that cuts over to 336. This road is a mix of pavement and dirt, so I tell the group that Sara and I are heading off and we'll meet on 336. We take off. This is a typical county road, very narrow with no centerline, but the view is incredible. We ride down through a valley with rocky hills on each side. There's a creek that runs through the valley and we cross it many times. After about 20 minutes we hit dirt. After another 2 minutes the road ends at a big gate with a private property sign. Dangit! Well, that's that so I turn around and we head back to 335 and try to catch up with the rest of the group. This is when things start to get interesting. You see, riding two up at high speed and then having to back track has used up quite a bit of fuel and we are a looong way from Leakey. We hit 335 to 41, 41 to 336 and the fuel warning light comes on. I tell Sara about our situation and she's cool. Not much we can do, so we head down 336. BTW, this is the same road I totaled my Sprint on last year and tell Sara I'll point out where I went down.

It's 27 miles to fuel. 336 is a roller coaster of a road. Up, down, up, down
so keeping a steady, gas-saving pace is out of the question, but I try. We get to where I went down and I point it out to Sara. Not a minute later BMzilla runs out of gas. ****! Is this place cursed? We've got 15 miles to go. So I shut it down and we coast for a good ways down hill. We come to a stop and, to our luck, off to the right up a hill is an old beat up truck. Now this being Texas, you just don't walk up without introducing yourself, who know who is there and what caliber gun they carry. Cautiously I walk up the hill yelling hellooo. No answer. I walk past the truck up the hill just to make sure but no ones around. I go back to the truck, it's an old Ford with a cab on the bed. I look inside and see a gas can! How lucky is that! And after testing the lock, the cab is unlocked too! I go back to the bike where Sara is waiting and tell her I've found a gas can and will try to siphon some gas. I take the vent hoses off the bike and go back to the truck. I lift the hatch but can't get the tailgate down, so I climb in, ducking and lifting a leg. Well, did I mention this is an old beat up truck? The handle on the gate was rusted and a little beat up with metal sticking out. As I lifted a leg over, the crotch of my pants gets caught and I hear RRRRRRIIIIPPPP. Oh no!! I've got a 4-inch rip in my jeans in the worst possible location. Thank god I didn't go commando cause even with under crackers on my giggle stick and man berries were hanging out!! Did I mention that this is the first time I've met Sara? Now she's REALLY going to get to know me!! I walk back and tell her the news. She says that I'm lucky I only got my pants ripped and nothing more personal, if you know what I mean. I immediately thank god!!! She laughs her *** off.

Back to the gas situation. After I get the can, I try and siphon gas, only thing I got was two mouthfuls of gas. Not good. At this time another truck from up the hill comes by. A nice old couple asks me what's up. I tell them the situation and they are willing to give us a ride. I ask Sara to go with them and I'll wait here. But before they leave I try tilting the bike way over to the right. I hear gas trickle over. Hmmm...let's see how far I get. It's 15 miles to gas. The closer I get, the less time I have to wait for them to get back. I put my gear on. Hold me berries in me pants and throw a leg over. Sara gets another good chuckle. The bike starts and I take off. I get about 10 miles and I run out again. Sara and our new friends catch up and I tell them I'm really out of gas so the continue on. I pop the gas cap and shake the bike, I can still hear gas. This time I lay BMzilla on it's right side. After I can't hear gas trickle anymore, I pick it up and try starting. It starts!! I'm off and catch up to Sara and decide to stay behind them and make it all the way back to Leakey. With 20 yards to before the gas station the bike dies again but I coast into the station. We thank our new friends and say our goodbyes. I fill up with 6.2 gallons!!

Dee's nuts... So, how does Dee's nuts fit? When I went to Virgina Beach to meet some friend we went to this eclectic shop and they found this tee shirt for me.

999079-S.jpg


Didn't mean to wear this shirt, it was just in the rotation. Little did I know how fate would play into this decision!

We were all to meet in Tarpley for dinner at Mac and Ernie's. We pull in about 10 minutes after the group (we made **** good time-hehehe), Brooke runs up and Sara starts telling her what happened.

(Here's a shot of the two punks looking for trouble. They found it...me and Will!)

999080-S.jpg


So now Brooke, laughing, is fixated on my crotch. I ask them to wait till tonight and we'll tell the story to the gang. After ordering, I joined the rest of the group at a picnic table. Problem...I've got to swing a leg over the bench and Brooke is sitting directly in front of the only seat available and she's watching me with a big grin on her face. With my hand on my crotch, I swing a leg over and sit quickly with a thud that shakes everyone. Will, without knowing what happened, looks over at me and says, 'Dee's nuts.' Brooke loses it. Tears running down her face, she got snot running...no...not running, spewing out her nose all over her shirt and can't stop laughing. She gets up and heads to the bathroom with Sara cause I think she peed herself.

That night in front of a big bonfire, Sara and I tell the gang about the Dee's Nuts incident.
 
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